There are great communicators and there are bad communicators. The difference between the two is that great communicators connect with their listeners, and do so by answering four questions of themselves regularly.

But what does a connector look like? What are the defining characteristics of someone who can connect well with his listeners?

There are many ways for a leader to stand out from the rest. But one of the most influential ways is to be a great communicator. It doesn’t matter if you are leading a large corporation, a small business, a church, or even your family. Great leaders connect well with others.

You may use your communication skill in a more public manner in certain positions, but every leader must communicate. And in order to be a great communicator, you need to be a great connector.

I’ve identified six qualities or characteristics of a connector. These aren’t necessarily exhaustive; there may be other qualities that I’ve not identified. But throughout more than two decades of speaking to teens, and now all ages, as a minister, I’ve discovered that these six qualities must be present in order to build that connection with my listeners.

In this post, we will examine the first three on the list, and take a look at the rest later this week.

Here are the first three qualities of a connector:

Connectors are focused on others

This is especially true in ministry. The New Testament tells us over and over to put the needs of others above our own needs. But even though the Bible instructs us in this, it also just makes good sense. When you focus on others, they can sense that you care about them. And if they can sense that you care, then they are more willing to listen and even buy into what you are talking about. That’s the difference between a public speaker and a communicator. A public speaker puts the message before the people. But a connector puts the people before the message.

Connectors keep the message simple

If you want to connect well with your listeners, you must place yourself on common ground with them. You have to keep your message simple and understandable. If you aren’t clear, your listeners will leave not knowing exactly what you want them to do or feel about what you were talking about. Keep your message simple, and repeat it often. When I write my sermons or lessons, I review them multiple times, trying to say things more simply and more clearly. This helps people grasp the message quickly and easily.

It’s a lot like communicating with my four-year-old. When I need to instruct him about something, he needs my to keep it simple. And he needs to hear it often. Great connectors do the same thing.

Connectors are great storytellers

A great story is best told with enthusiasm and animation. When you immerse yourself in the story, your listeners will jump in with you. The next logical step in this progression is engaging your listeners in participating with you. When you tell a great story, you want your listeners to go on that journey with you. Share your heart. Use humor and spontaneity. If you want to impress your listeners, tell them your successes. But if you want to impact them, tell them stories of your failures. Either way, stories stick and make a continual impact while your three point outline and principles fade. Make sure your stories make your point for you, and you’ll make the point for e much longer time.

Being a great connector requires a lot of effort. It takes work. But the payoff is well worth all the time and energy you invest in your communication skills and people skills. When you connect with people, they engage with you and buy in to what you are saying. They connect because you have invested in them.

As a minister, I believe that the message provides the motivation for connecting with people. The message I have is life-changing! What better reason to connect?

In my next post, we’ll look at three more qualities of connectors. I hope you’ll take a look.

Keeping in mind that we still have three more qualities to examine, what would you add to this list? You can leave your thoughts in the comments section below.